{"id":4968,"date":"2021-03-22T01:13:50","date_gmt":"2021-03-22T01:13:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/?p=4968"},"modified":"2021-05-08T14:21:35","modified_gmt":"2021-05-08T14:21:35","slug":"thank-you-very-much","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/thank-you-very-much\/","title":{"rendered":"Thank You Very Much"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-4969 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/thank-you-3.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"240\" height=\"160\" \/>It happened again.<\/p>\n<p>In the last couple weeks, probably four people commented on my haircut, how nice and natural everything hangs, how well my tresses frame my face.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m usually taken aback when I hear such comments. I\u2019ve been getting my hair cut the same way for years; a long bob, with layers close to my scalp cut a little shorter to add the appearance of volume.<\/p>\n<p>I confess to some of my hair style fans that the secret is actually the color. When I get a cut, every three months, I\u2019ve started to have Jill, my stylist, apply hair coloring which washes out over twenty shampoos or so. I\u2019ve opted to refresh my look with my natural color.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s funny how when people look at me shortly after a cut and a color, they know something\u2019s different but don\u2019t seem to focus on the color since it\u2019s so natural.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t know why I tell them that I had extras performed at my quarterly salon visit. I don\u2019t know why I just don\u2019t say \u201cThank you very much.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Well yes, I suppose I like to be truthful. I want to keep the record straight. Maybe I don\u2019t want to give the impression that a miracle cut will take fifteen years off your face.<\/p>\n<p>But I notice this habitual reaction to deflect or minimize a compliment in so many instances.<\/p>\n<p>If a dinner guest remarks on the tenderness and flavor of my main course, I\u2019ll rave about my butcher.<\/p>\n<p>If someone asks me if I lost weight, I\u2019ll remark on the style of my slacks or the importance of wearing over-sized tops. (Sometimes, I even say, \u201cNo, I actually think I\u2019ve gained a couple pounds.\u201d)<\/p>\n<p>If a friend remarks on my stick-to-itiveness, I\u2019ll disparage my own tenacity by alluding to the length of time I\u2019ve been working on something. I\u2019ll talk up my disappointment for not having cracked the code yet or not being farther along than I am towards reaching a goal.<\/p>\n<p>I could point to a lot of childhood experiences that might account for some of this. Back in the 60s, when I was growing up, modesty was considered a virtue, especially for girls. The promise of boys liking you or not liking you was never far from a quandary over claiming the spotlight.<\/p>\n<p>I was often asked to downplay accomplishments so as not to upset my emotionally high-strung sister. I was asked to take on some of the \u201cresponsibility\u201d for keeping peace in our household. (Put that way, I guess it\u2019s sort of difficult to choose something else.)<\/p>\n<p>After time, it sort of became normal for me to dismiss things that I probably should have given myself more credit for. I even took on the habit of getting upset at myself for wanting attention in the first place.<\/p>\n<p>Just a few weeks ago, a <a href=\"https:\/\/thethreetomatoes.com\/never-too-old.\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">blog post<\/a> that I wrote a few years ago was re-printed in a great women\u2019s e-pub. (It is also featured in my book, <strong>The Best of No Small Thing \u2014 Mindful Meditations<\/strong>.)<\/p>\n<p>I have to thank <a href=\"https:\/\/linktr.ee\/Bookandwinelovers\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Stephanie Rabell<\/a>, for the introduction to the Three Tomatoes and so much more in support of my publishing efforts. I also got important input from the principals at the <a href=\"https:\/\/canfieldharrisonretreat.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Canfield-Harrison Mastermind Retreat<\/a>, encouraging me to explore syndication.<\/p>\n<p>There&#8217;s a lot of recognition to go around.<\/p>\n<p>But I\u2019m entertaining a new type of experience around being noticed in a positive way.<\/p>\n<p>I posted the milestone on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. I fielded several congratulatory comments.<\/p>\n<p>Instead of deflecting or minimizing or simply not acknowledging these kudos and compliments,\u00a0 I practiced saying, \u201cThank you very much.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ahhhhh.<\/p>\n<p>Taking in a compliment is no small thing.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It happened again&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5118,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[467,468,469,54,466],"class_list":["post-4968","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-canfield-harrison","tag-lost-weight","tag-natural-color","tag-no-small-thing","tag-taking-a-compliment","grateful-dozen-self-appreciation"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Thank You Very Much &#8211; No Small Thing<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" 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