{"id":56,"date":"2012-02-28T19:54:00","date_gmt":"2012-02-28T19:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/?p=56"},"modified":"2021-05-08T14:35:30","modified_gmt":"2021-05-08T14:35:30","slug":"on-another-note","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/on-another-note\/","title":{"rendered":"On Another Note"},"content":{"rendered":"<div><a href=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-IAWfBHGrQSg\/T00pXCqtoNI\/AAAAAAAAATY\/RW06eHcjh2w\/s1600\/pay%2Battention%2Bsnote%2Bclose%2Bup2.JPG\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" alt=\"\" src=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-IAWfBHGrQSg\/T00pXCqtoNI\/AAAAAAAAATY\/RW06eHcjh2w\/s320\/pay%2Battention%2Bsnote%2Bclose%2Bup2.JPG\" width=\"320\" height=\"240\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n<p>One morning last week, as I walked up to my car, I noticed what appeared to be a small business card tucked under the edge of my driver\u2019s side window. Must be a marketing piece for a small business, I thought, some kind of Joe Blow &amp; Sons tuckpointing or auto glass replacement enterprise. But as I got closer, I saw a note written in block letters, some in caps, with a red Sharpie marker.<\/p>\n<p><b>PAY ATTN: You\u2019re taking up 2 spaces, Be considerate.<\/b><\/p>\n<p>Obviously, this note was not written by a gang banger or twenty-something who, addicted to texting, had forgotten the proper use of contractions. Outwardly, this note was written by someone who, like me, was concerned with maintaining civility and thoughtfulness in a society hell bent on propagating \u201cme-me-me\u201d thinking. Here was a call for more <b><i>consideration<\/i><i><\/i><\/b>, for God\u2019s sake.<\/p>\n<p>I became uncomfortable then outraged, then doubting. I watched myself go through a range of emotions and thoughts, enough to have consumed several talk therapy sessions with a seasoned social worker.<\/p>\n<p>I contemplated my conscious intention to be respectful of others. For the most part, I think I bring a rare level of empathy to my dealings in the world. I try to consider people\u2019s feelings and not make comments that might be unkind, non-instructive or without positive purpose. It bothered me that someone perceived my behavior as suspect, as lacking in this particular way. Then I watched my thoughts get really tangled up as I tried to see myself in the note-writer\u2019s shoes.<\/p>\n<p>Imagine driving down a street late one cold February night and seeing something you find so objectionable you have to rifle through your belongings to find a writing tool and swatch of paper then get out of your cozy car to rip off a note. Who would do such a thing?<\/p>\n<p>After spending a few seconds upset that a stranger may have perceived me as impolite or inconsiderate, I got mad. I felt unfairly judged. How did this other driver know how much space I had in front of my car <b><i>when<\/i><\/b> I parked almost a day earlier? The parking configuration of any street changes constantly. I studied where I had parked for several minutes. The car was about three feet in front of an alley and about 2 feet behind a tan Toyota. No way could another car have fit legally in the area even if I parked closer to the car in front of mine. I became fixated on corroborating my point of view and found myself almost aggressively questioning passersby, dog-walkers mostly, who were more concerned with whether their Lab or Corgi had a good BM.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnother car couldn\u2019t fit here?\u201d I blurted out as I looked into their faces. \u201cAm I right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The two nearest dog-walkers agreed and shook their heads. (At the impossibility of the parking feat, I am assuming.)<\/p>\n<p>I continued dancing arm in arm with my inner rant for a few days until I remembered the small pad of Post-It notes I carry in my car\u2019s console. I have turned indignant on many occasions \u2013 after being cut off by taxi drivers or too-tall SUVs \u2013 where I would jot down license plate numbers thinking I would report them to some sort of <b><i>bad drivers hotline<\/i><\/b>, I suppose. These pages of scribbled notes usually made it to the trash in about a week. Some behaviors we see in the world certainly merit reporting, but so often, our reactions to someone else\u2019s behaviors are about something else.<\/p>\n<p>While I was busy worrying about whether I was being disrespected, by obsessing, I had started treating time itself without respect. In leaving her <i>Pay Attention<\/i> note on my car window, this driver may have been reacting to something that had little to do with me. Or, even in the case that I could have been more space conscious in how I parked, the worse possible consequence for this driver was that she had to park a half block away; a minor inconvenience. Rushing to claim victimhood and puffing up with righteous indignation is unproductive. It\u2019s actually disrespectful to yourself and to time.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes life leads you to the perfect experience for reminding you what kind of person you want to be (and don\u2019t want to be) &#8212; and that\u2019s no small thing.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One morning last week, as I walked up to my car, I noticed what appeared&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-56","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","grateful-dozen-humor"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>On Another Note &#8211; 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