{"id":89,"date":"2011-06-28T14:41:00","date_gmt":"2011-06-28T14:41:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/?p=89"},"modified":"2021-05-08T14:21:40","modified_gmt":"2021-05-08T14:21:40","slug":"a-woman-of-a-certain-age","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/a-woman-of-a-certain-age\/","title":{"rendered":"A Woman of a Certain Age"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-gyX0hEvPbKU\/TgnoNDCR_SI\/AAAAAAAAAMc\/AqXmNOmvcLs\/s1600\/lady%2Bin%2Bkeyhole%2Bfrom%2Bdickson%2Bwebsite.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" alt=\"\" src=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-gyX0hEvPbKU\/TgnoNDCR_SI\/AAAAAAAAAMc\/AqXmNOmvcLs\/s320\/lady%2Bin%2Bkeyhole%2Bfrom%2Bdickson%2Bwebsite.jpg\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a>There\u2019s a sculpture I like to look at when I walk to Whole Foods or to my health club. It\u2019s right in front of the Chicago Center for Photography. The artist, Jennifer Dickson, calls it Being There\/There Being. I call it Lady in a Keyhole. It\u2019s actually composed of three separate pieces arranged on a small triangular patch of grass. The iron pieces, set on round pads of concrete, I believe, were arranged to suggest the dynamic nature of time and space. Certainly, one gets a very different feeling of the work depending on their vantage point.<\/p>\n<p>But something almost magical happens when I look, straight on, at this feminine shape through the not quite meshing jaws of the two other pieces staggered in front. I identify with the figure, this woman at the end of the tunnel or keyhole. I actually imagine I am in her place, that I am not focusing on a simple figure at the end of a restricted field, but that I am looking out from beyond these giant metal incisors\u2026 at the world. When I look at the Lady in a Keyhole, and think of myself as the Lady in the keyhole, I feel more like the \u201cseer\u201d than the \u201cseen,\u201d the observer and not the object. And this makes me think about how differently I feel about myself as a woman in my fifties than I did as a woman in my twenties.<\/p>\n<p>My very Italian friend, Angela, used to invoke the resigned curse of her grandmother when describing aging. Anziani \u00e8 brutto. Getting older is ugly. Or is it something else?<\/p>\n<p>Last week, I went to a cosmetics store. I don\u2019t start my day \u201cputting on a face,\u201d but I decided I should augment my soap and water routine with some sort of high-powered anti-aging cream.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI want to get rid of these fine lines,\u201d I sighed to the skincare specialist. &#8220;I have a very expressive face, and I have creases above my eyebrows and here,\u201d I pointed. \u201cOn the sides of my eyes.\u201d I remember looking up at the forty-something year-old woman with highlighted, well-coiffed, hair. She was wearing a long-sleeved smock cum lab coat that made her look like a scientific artist or artistic scientist.<\/p>\n<p>She said. \u201cGet rid of your fine lines? We can firm things up a bit, but you can\u2019t get rid of them. Why would you want to? You\u2019ve EARNED them.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Well that was a funny thought, I considered. Then I contemplated how I had become the lady in the keyhole looking outward, a woman of wisdom and compassion, dedicated to being of service without being anyone\u2019s mother or martyr, curious and discerning, simultaneously open to new experiences and deeply appreciative of what was in front of me. I had become someone more concerned with how I saw the world than with how the world saw me.<\/p>\n<p>When I was young, I wanted to be thin enough, smart enough (although not too smart), adventurous and reserved in proper proportions, according to some other defined guide \u2013 whatever it would take to be liked, to be desired. I wanted to be wanted. And now, I mostly want to experience life through my own eyes, my own ears and my own skin (even if I have a few fine lines on my forehead). I want to look out at the world from my own perspective and look back through the keyhole at myself and know I am standing tall. I can stand firm and I can move on my own volition.<\/p>\n<p>Loving a woman of a certain age, especially when that woman is YOU, is no small thing.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There\u2019s a sculpture I like to look at when I walk to Whole Foods or&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-89","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","grateful-dozen-self-appreciation"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>A Woman of a Certain Age &#8211; No Small Thing<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nosmallthing.net\/main\/a-woman-of-a-certain-age\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A Woman of a Certain Age &#8211; 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