A friend of mine called me one evening the other week.
An actress, a catering waitress, an alley recycler (keen on finding perfectly usable exercise equipment or baby gear that could find a second home through the right charity), she also fosters dogs.
Before India came to live with me, she slept for a time in a crate in my friend’s kitchen and probably was given a bath in a deep basin in her basement.
“Deb,” she paused, preparing for the big ask. “You said your niece, maybe other people you know, are interested in fostering. Can you help me find someone who will take Luna? I’ve still got Peaches here, and I can’t really keep two dogs now.”
“The pet ministry just took on a dog under rush conditions. I think she’s some sort of lab-spaniel mix. I’m not sure. A female, seven months old. I don’t think she’s had her shots yet. Anyway, she’s coming here. Tonight.”
“She was in a home where they just had a baby. The baby seems to be scared of her and the father just dumped her with a vet or a friend. She’s being picked up now. It would be great if we could find someone that would foster her — at least until we could figure out some options.”
With the aid of smart phone photo transfer technology, I sent Luna’s pic to a few people, along with the sketchy information I had.
I don’t know why the thought came to me, but there was a wonderful woman who lived in my building until two years ago. She had a very large, but very mellow English Lab, who passed away since her move.
I got in touch with her and made introductions. Level-headed about the situation, that the animal experienced some degree of trauma already, she agreed to come from a neighboring state to take the pup, at least for a couple weeks.
I thought about the word “foster,” “fostering.”
The definition revolves around “encouraging” or “promoting” the development of someone.
Of course, it’s easy to have negative associations as many children survived less than loving treatment in a foster home, but, in many cases foster situations are blessings, second chances to form bonds or escape dangerous situations and have a very different experience of life.
A fostering relationship is not about duty or fulfilling an obligation. To foster someone or an animal may not be a permanent situation but, I think it’s a healing arrangement for everyone involved.
People that foster an animal give love and nutrition and patience and create a safe space. It’s so special when someone can give their best freely, without attachment, without ownership or expectations.
There’s a kind of reward in knowing that resources and affection can be given as an offering.
And in a good fostering situation, an animal learns how to trust again. That’s like giving them their life back.
I don’t know if it was a question of timing. I certainly don’t know if fostering Luna will turn into adoption, but my former neighbor had a home and patience and the willingness to let someone into her heart, or, at least help the animal through a transition.
Upon hearing that my former neighbor picked up the dog, I texted a short thank you and received the following.
“She is very sweet. You can tell she must have been yelled at or even hit in her young life. She is great with other dogs, and she has been great with cats, doesn’t chase or bark at them. Just really wants to be their friend… lol. Weather’s been icky since getting back, so I haven’t been able to show her the lake or walk around the lake yet!”
It made me feel so good to be part of this connection. Even if it’s not permanent, it’s a chance to build a little faith.
I wish everybody took up opportunities to foster another soul, to give what they have to give and know that it makes a big difference. Supporting another while they re-learn how to trust is gratifying beyond what can be imagined.
Being even just a link in such a chain, an adventure of learning trust and forming bonds, is no small thing.
Deb, this an exceptionally beautiful, touching post. Thank you.
I love the added depth you have shared about “fostering”.
❤️🐕🐶🦮🐕🦺🐩🐾❤️