It happened again.

In the last couple weeks, probably four people commented on my haircut, how nice and natural everything hangs, how well my tresses frame my face.

I’m usually taken aback when I hear such comments. I’ve been getting my hair cut the same way for years; a long bob, with layers close to my scalp cut a little shorter to add the appearance of volume.

I confess to some of my hair style fans that the secret is actually the color. When I get a cut, every three months, I’ve started to have Jill, my stylist, apply hair coloring which washes out over twenty shampoos or so. I’ve opted to refresh my look with my natural color.

It’s funny how when people look at me shortly after a cut and a color, they know something’s different but don’t seem to focus on the color since it’s so natural.

I don’t know why I tell them that I had extras performed at my quarterly salon visit. I don’t know why I just don’t say “Thank you very much.”

Well yes, I suppose I like to be truthful. I want to keep the record straight. Maybe I don’t want to give the impression that a miracle cut will take fifteen years off your face.

But I notice this habitual reaction to deflect or minimize a compliment in so many instances.

If a dinner guest remarks on the tenderness and flavor of my main course, I’ll rave about my butcher.

If someone asks me if I lost weight, I’ll remark on the style of my slacks or the importance of wearing over-sized tops. (Sometimes, I even say, “No, I actually think I’ve gained a couple pounds.”)

If a friend remarks on my stick-to-itiveness, I’ll disparage my own tenacity by alluding to the length of time I’ve been working on something. I’ll talk up my disappointment for not having cracked the code yet or not being farther along than I am towards reaching a goal.

I could point to a lot of childhood experiences that might account for some of this. Back in the 60s, when I was growing up, modesty was considered a virtue, especially for girls. The promise of boys liking you or not liking you was never far from a quandary over claiming the spotlight.

I was often asked to downplay accomplishments so as not to upset my emotionally high-strung sister. I was asked to take on some of the “responsibility” for keeping peace in our household. (Put that way, I guess it’s sort of difficult to choose something else.)

After time, it sort of became normal for me to dismiss things that I probably should have given myself more credit for. I even took on the habit of getting upset at myself for wanting attention in the first place.

Just a few weeks ago, a blog post that I wrote a few years ago was re-printed in a great women’s e-pub. (It is also featured in my book, The Best of No Small Thing — Mindful Meditations.)

I have to thank Stephanie Rabell, for the introduction to the Three Tomatoes and so much more in support of my publishing efforts. I also got important input from the principals at the Canfield-Harrison Mastermind Retreat, encouraging me to explore syndication.

There’s a lot of recognition to go around.

But I’m entertaining a new type of experience around being noticed in a positive way.

I posted the milestone on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. I fielded several congratulatory comments.

Instead of deflecting or minimizing or simply not acknowledging these kudos and compliments,  I practiced saying, “Thank you very much.”

Ahhhhh.

Taking in a compliment is no small thing.