People tend to be reactive.  A first response to anything is usually shaped by a perception of immediate benefit. Responses are often habitual. People tend to respond, in actions and emotions, to how they’ve responded to similar situations in the past. But what if everyone assessed a situation as it occurs?  This might require extra energy but is worth trying more often. When you find yourself lashing out or shutting yourself off because you feel threatened or because you mistrust the information you’re getting, ask yourself what exactly you’re reacting to. You might consider the effect of your reaction on other people. Consider whether you’re encountering an actual threat in the moment and evaluate different options for responding. Thank yourself when you can stay grounded in the moment.